In 2007, I resolve to ...

In 2007, I resolve to ...

• Be The Listener before being The Decider. - President Bush

• Aim before I fire. - Vice President Cheney

• Augment wonky policy prescriptions with personal style. - Sen. Hillary Clinton, D-N.Y.

• Augment personal style with wonky policy prescriptions. - Sen. Barack Obama, D-Ill.

• Pick fights with Republicans, not Democrats. - Incoming House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, D-Calif.

• Deposit cash in the bank, not the freezer. - Rep. William Jefferson, D-La.

• Deposit classified documents at the National Archives, not under construction trailers. - Former national security adviser Samuel Berger

• Study Middle East history. - Incoming House Intelligence Chairman Silvestre Reyes, D-Texas

• Look for men my own age. - Former representative Mark Foley, R-Fla.

• Stop trying to tell jokes. - Sen. John Kerry, D-Mass. John Kerry

• Stick to telling jokes. - Ranting comedian Michael Richards

• Blame America second. - Ranting Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez

• Visit Auschwitz and the Holocaust Museum. - Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad

• Get a decent haircut and not blow up the world. - North Korean leader Kim Jong Il

• Give up power when my term is up. Really. - Russian President Vladimir Putin

• Not buy green bananas. - Condemned Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein

Reject "hypothetical" murder confessions. - Book publisher Judith Regan

• Wear underpants. - Singer Britney Spears

• Ignore Donald Trump. - Talk show hostess Rosie O'Donnell

• Ignore Rosie O'Donnell. - Businessman/reality TV star Donald Trump

• Stay ahead of Warren Buffett in charitable giving. - Microsoft founder Bill Gates

• Give my $200 million golden parachute to shareholders or the Gates' foundation. - Former Pfizer CEO Hank McKinnell

• Learn to play solitaire. - Jailed former Enron CEO Jeff Skilling

• Learn to speak Greenspanese. - Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke

• Never play football, or ride my motorcycle, without a helmet. - Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger

• Use my head, not lose my head. - French soccer star Zinedine Zidane

• Retire gracefully after my 754th home run. - San Francisco Giants slugger Barry Bonds

• Play golf left-handed, to give others a chance. - Tiger Woods

• Shut my mouth and catch the damn ball. - Dallas Cowboys receiver Terrell Owens